318 Haunted By
190 Haunting
Stacia

Stacia in Progress

Sparkling water fanatic. Lover of random crap. Goodreads member curious to see if the grass really is greener on the other side.

Currently reading

Dreams of Gods & Monsters
Laini Taylor
Still Life with Strings
L.H. Cosway
Rated YA-MA : Adults Who Read Young Adult Fiction
Rated YA-MA 2854 members
A group for adult lovers of Young Adult fiction. We feature a different type of book for each mon...

Books we've read

Vampire Academy Vampire Academy
by Richelle Mead
Start date: September 1, 2013

Eve and Adam Eve and Adam
by Michael Grant
Start date: August 1, 2013



View this group on Goodreads »

At Least it Wasn't Strike Three

Devil's Game - Joanna Wylde

I am a horrible person. I suppose that I should feel guilty about taking so much energy to rant about the horrible sh*t that went down in book 1 and book 2, when I'm about to majorly drop the ball on reviewing this book, which I actually did like.

It's not even that pointing out frustrations is more fun (oh who am I kidding; it can be), it's just that I still haven't had the time and/or desire to want to review much lately - even for books that made me happy. 

The lead female actually used her brain more than once. I know! I couldn't believe it either, after being so disappointed with Marie and Sophie in previous books. Em was a little bit stronger, a little bit tougher, and a little bit sassier.She also knew when to walk the hell away from a situation that wasn't good for her. *applause*

Hunter wasn't a role model, and that was okay for this particular story. Even with the continuation of the kidnapping plot (which I am thoroughly sick of in MC books), I felt like we got to see an admittedly damaged man come into his own in a way which felt somewhat believable. Hunter had issues, but he KNEW he had issues. He KNEW he was a stalker. He KNEW that he had to get Em off the crazy train. How much better would most super-heavy-drama books be if the screwed up characters actually took some responsibility for their shit? 

I loved watching Hunter grow. I loved watching Hunter's buried sensitive side come out. 

There was some great sexual tension, and much of it was fueled by Em. She already knew what being in the lifestyle meant and what the sacrifices would be, which made her acceptance of everything easier to digest than it had been with Marie and Sophie, who had gone along for the ride far too easily for my preference. 

I know a lot of people didn't like this book as much as the first two, but I felt the writing and characters were stronger on every level. I would rather read something that makes sense and has true character development over reading something that has no entertainment value outside of a drama/shock factor. At least this time, I didn't feel like I was being lead around through a mad house only for the purpose of waiting for a halfway decent sex scene. 

The bantering humor was a welcome addition. The sex wasn't as mind blowing as I would have liked, but the chemistry and timing was excellent, so the balance worked for me. 

My only gripe : I was very put off by the author note at the end, almost "apologizing" for the NA character ages. I agree that NA has a bit of a stigma right now, but don't justify writing what what you want to write. It only fuels the stereotype of certain things being lesser than others. While I do feel that there's a lot of crap NA out there right now, it has not ONE thing to do with character ages, and more to do with cliched and bad writing. If your book is good, it's good, regardless of character age. If the fans can't see that, shake it off and continue writing your next adult book. Please don't make explanations for what you want to do. *soapbox off*

I'm really looking forward to Picnic's book!

Ready to Get Off the Tour Bus

Double Time - Olivia Cunning

Very disappointed. I have enjoyed this series for the most part, and loved books 3 and 4. I can't believe I held off on reading Trey's book for so long, then ended up experiencing so much letdown.

I know that polyamory works for many people and that it can be a legitimate form of relationship(s). I have a couple of friends who live this way, so I've seen it firsthand. 

Unfortunately, it's rare that a book is able to convey this type of relationship in a believable light. The closest I've seen was in the book Rough, Raw, and Ready

Mild (nothing major) spoilers ahead.

Why Double Time did not work for me :

1. The insta-love was off the charts. I'm not anti-insta-love. In some cases, it's written fine. But we've seen it before (and done better) already in book 1 of this series. Considering Trey's backstory, it felt very bizarre that he fell in love with not only one, but TWO people so quickly. His journey to healing was too easily solved by finding Reagan. 

2. I didn't believe that the answer to Trey's heartache was to fall in love with two people. This story would have been more believable as a m/m book. Just because Trey is bisexual, it shouldn't have meant that the only way for him to be happy was to fall in love with both a man and woman.

If he wanted to live a poly lifestyle, I would have preferred him to have known this ahead of time and gone into the relationship with the female having her eyes wide open. For him to get involved with a woman, then tell her after the fact that she did NOT complete him - it made me shake my head. There are very few women people who could deal with being told that they are not enough for someone. The way that the situation was handled was the complete opposite of tactful. 

3. Trey didn't have the same uniqueness that I saw in the former books. He had lost some of his zing. I was completely bored with him outside of the sex scenes, which was not how things were before. Trey used to be my favorite character.

Things that worked for me :

Nothing. Not even the sex scenes. Something about Reagan bothered me (couldn't put my finger on it), so I couldn't even get into her head for the sex scenes. 

I'm sad that I had to end an enjoyable series on a sour note. Ah well. I've been trying to skim Sinners at the Altar and am not getting into it. Maybe I'm over the Sinners now. I don't even know why Trey's getting another book after this. Supposedly, his story wasn't wrapped up, but I'm pretty sure that I don't much care what happens next for him. 

I might still read Dare's spin-off book though. I do heart Dare.

Dusting off the Reading Cobwebs

Fight Club - Chuck Palahniuk
The first rule about fight club is you don't talk about fightclub.


...so I won't.

 

(I was surprised by how much the book and movie lined up. This might be one of the closest book/movie adaptations I've ever seen.)

I'm riding this brokedown pony into the ground.

The King (Black Dagger Brotherhood, #12) - J.R. Ward

I finally finished the book! My first in April, actually. Yes, it's the 14th. It's called real life, bitches. Sometimes books take a backseat. 

By now, most of the die-hard fans who were going to read this have already done so. I've seen the complaints. I share a few of the complaints.

But it's Ward. She's like this comfort-food writer for me. Even when it's bad, I always know that I'll laugh a few times, and will get at the very least a few moments of good sexual tension. So I keep reading.

But dear me, even I couldn't ignore the fifty PoV's this time. I was one of the people who didn't mind when the series left the cookie-cutter PNR format in favor of a more broad-scaled world at around book 7. The extra PoV's were helpful in getting me excited for future stories to come. Yes, sometimes the extras overtook the main story, and I wasn't always a fan of that. But I generally liked the side stories as well, with a few exceptions (I've never been a fan of the lengthy flashbacks). 

However, it's gotten out of hand. Between iAm, Trez, Xcor, Assail, Throe, Saxton, etc. (including the flip side with the female PoV's) and the flashbacks, plus the current Wrath/Beth story...yeah. We were more than maxed out on PoV's. 

That said... It was really only the Assail/Sola story which didn't work for me. A lot of people like this couple, but I've never attached to them. I'm still in the Xcor/Layla camp. And I was surprised by how much I enjoyed Trez/Selena's chemistry in this book. I love how Trez isn't the traditional white male character. And since Xcor isn't attractive at all (not like how Z is scarred but you can tell he's still hot), I love that too. Ward's starting to write a little out of her comfort zone. 

And iam?!? 

a virgin! Yay!

(show spoiler)

 Yay! Yay! Yay!

I know that so many people are throwing in the towel. I won't be. The familiarity and brotherhood and awesome sexual chemistry keeps me coming back, even when it takes me WEEKS to read the darn book because of parts that drag. 

The pros are still outweighing the cons. Maybe it won't always be this way, but sometimes I need to have something familiar to fall back on when I'm tired of constantly having to start new books and learn new characters. Familiar works for me in this instance.

Cover Love

Etiquette & Espionage  - Gail Carriger

Super cute. Super sassy. Super witty.

Strike that. It looks like I'm trying to sell glitzy fashion to tweens. 

3.25 stars. But it is super cute and fun and all that stuff.Werewolves are wearing top hats! Just the names alone are awesome, and I really hate off-the-wall names 99% of time, but how can you not love the idea of mechanical butler named Frowbritcher? I'm pretty sure that Carriger is one of the only people who can pull off all of the strange names with finesse.

And I don't even know what this means, but I want to start saying it -

"So I can be a puffed-up poodle-faker like you?"


Parasol Protectorate fans are probably going to flinch when I mention that I think I liked E&E a slight bit better than Soulless for book 1 of a series. I get that Soulless had more snark and overt humor than E&E did, but I took to Sophronia's fresh and spunky attitude more than I did Alexia's musings about her large nose. I laughed out loud when Sophronia considered a purple flannel night garment to be salacious (to quote her : imagine that!). 

Gail Carriger's writing style is sort of a weird thing to explain. She has all of the parts present which make for an excellent book - unique characters, harrowing situations, charming imagery, witty banter, etc. - but there's something about the sum of the parts which doesn't quite register in my brain as a complete success. 

Every time I would pick up the book, I'd read a few chapters and be entertained, but I could never go much further in one sitting. I felt like I was on this constant loop of intricacy, and I couldn't make my brain stop moving enough to take it all in large doses. Imagine going to the same tea party every day. The tea is good. The company is good. The conversation is interesting. But you feel like you need to get off the tea party for a minute and have pizza and beer. That's what I feel like when I read Carriger. 



In small doses, the words are charming and fun and stimulating. In large doses, I want to wander off and read something else. And that's why it took me a couple of weeks to read the book, even though I liked it. 

But sometimes, it's okay to slowly savor the things that are good. I'm looking forward to savoring book 2 of this series.

Absolutely Unexpected

Goddess of Spring  - P.C. Cast

How wonderful is it to find a book about soul-mates where the coupling is actually focused on two people loving the soul of another person, and not about two people being brought together by some sort of instant connection? 

Before I go into what I really liked, two other things : 

1. The amount of Batman references were horrible. And annoying. Repetitive gushing - STOP IT. Besides, when is cape wearing a "romance hero thing?"
2. While I did sigh heavily at mentions of the street cats organization, animal affinities with cat/horses, the Tulsa location, and the close-knit relationship between the female lead and her grandmother (all things repeatedly mentioned in other Cast books), outside of those few things, I would have never known this book came from the author of the HoN train wreck. Apparently, there are still some things in this world which can surprise me. 

Now, I will commence with the good stuff :

This story is about a 40 something woman named Lina who is running a struggling bakery. She stumbles upon a recipe with a spell attached and (stupidly) does the spell in a plea for help. 

Demeter answers the plea and offers a solution : switch bodies for 6 months with her daughter Persephone, Goddess of Spring. Basically - go to the underworld and hook up with Hades, so her daughter didn't have to. 

Lina (again, stupidly) goes along with it, and in the process, inherits a youthful, nubile appearance which isn't her own true self.

Yes, stupidly. But this one time, I don't care as much about "stupidly" as I usually do because I loved the multiple messages of this story :

1. Friendship and bonds with other women are something to be celebrated. 

2. Kindness can break down walls.

3. People are rarely what they seem on the outside (this went both ways for Persephone and Hades). 

4. Real love is about more than physical attraction or outward beauty. 

Outside of the first few awkward chapters (I thought I wasn't going to like the book before Lina got to the underworld), the story flowed from one scene to the next, pulling me along in wonder. From Lina bonding with Orion the dreadsteed, to Lina helping Hades make narcissus bloom, I had a happy little smile pasted on my face as I read. 

This is the type of adult fairy tale that I love.

There was a little bit of everything. I appreciated the positive messages, I felt a little emotional over the scene with the soul-mate spirits at the river, I relished the steamy scenes, I laughed at a few light-hearted moments, and I even felt a couple of tears leak out as the story came to a close.

What would the Lord of the Dead do if he knew he had wooed, not the Goddess of Spring, but a middle-aged baker from the mortal world?


Rarely, do I even get excited over hot guy descriptions in romance anymore. Most of them are all the same and nothing new. But even I had a bit of a "hot damn" moment when it came to the scene with Hades working at the forge. My personal notes written in the book at that scene : FFS, I don't usually get worked up like this.

I wasn't sure if this would be a spoiler or not, but since it's not a huge plot point, I'll add it. I loved how Hades wanted to learn how best to please Persephone/Lina. It wasn't that he was inexperienced, but he knew that in order to be the right lover for her, he would need to learn her as she was, and not based on other experiences. It was a refreshing change from romance novel men who cockily think they know how to set every woman on fire. The intimate scenes between Hades and Persephone were tender and sincere, much more so than I've read in many books. Yet, he still had his "shake the ground with anger" type of wicked god moments, so it wasn't all about breaking every stereotype of his persona. The balance was lovely. 

"Teach me how to set you afire, too."


I'm not sure if this will be the book for everyone, but if you've been reading a lot of the same types of romance novels over and over, you might consider giving Goddess of the Spring a try. This is one of those books which could appeal to all ages, but I think would be special to women over 30. It really celebrates being a woman and becoming your own unique form of beautiful, even if you're not young and perfect looking. Just speed through the first few weird chapters (and pretend Lina doesn't make 50 Batman fangirl references) and it will get better.

~Lina as Persephone~

It's Wordy Wednesday

Today's random questions :

 

Without having any sort of fallout or butterfly effect chain reaction, what is one thing that you would go back in time and change?

 

 and

 

What's your favorite ice cream flavor?

Underwear is Unavailable in the Underworld

The Surrender of Persephone - Selena Kitt

Adult review for erotic content. Trigger Warning : Dubious Consent.

"Aidon, are you trying to recapture your youth with nubile young virgins? What's next, a new red chariot?"


The first thing you should know : Surrender of Persephone is PwP (Porn Without Plot) erotica. Here's where I pull out my apples-to-apples genre rating comparison because I'm only rating this compared to other PwP, not other "stories" in general. Now, PwP doesn't necessarily mean that there is no plot at all; what it generally means is that there is a higher ratio of sex to plot than a normal romance or mainstream erotica. In the case of Surrender, I consider the book to be one long rolling sex scene with some cool mythology references thrown in. Even though the story itself is sparse, the author still brought her own unique spin on the Hades/Persephone tale. If you've read into the darker tones of the myth involving the kidnap and conquering of Persephone, then you might understand why the author chose to take her story down the BDSM path.

His eyes glowed in the dimness, and he had a small, satisfied smile on his face. "You like the struggle, don't you?"


Now, as far as PwP goes, it's no secret that if I'm in the mood for it, I'll generally pick up Selena Kitt. Why? Because I like the way she writes sex. This woman writes sex how it feels, smells, sounds, etc. taking the reader to a place where it's not hard to imagine being there in the story.

In true Kitt fashion, there's always going to be a scene or two that runs over-the-top. In this case, the story's very first sex scene starts with spoiled little Persephone frolicking and engaging in a very giggly threesome with Artemis and Athena, sure to please any man's barely legal lesbian fantasies. 

They roll, tumble, twist their bodies in every position imaginable as three young, nubile young ladies get each other off over...and over...and over...

Yeah. I smile with amusement because it's kind of hot, in spite of how the girl-on-girl scenes in Kitt's books tend to run toward "oops, did I spill something on my see-through shirt?" kind of a blatant hook.

So I read through the "come on in!" intro and waited for the main event to happen - the appearance of Hades (translated to Aidon here) and his kidnapping of Persephone. Because that's when everything is going to change from giggly play to dark and dirty deeds.

"I will be the instrument of your greatest pain and pleasure."


Yep. That's where we're going. And clothing isn't optional - it's completely forbidden. 

BECAUSE IT'S EASIER TO HAVE NON-STOP SEX IF YOU ARE NAKED ALL OF THE TIME.

The sound of his palm biting her flesh made a resounding slap and she bit her lip, trying not to cry out. 

"I will be your sun...your moon...

Your day...your night..."

Persephone felt the impact vibrating through her. 

"Your heaven...your hell..."


Sure, there were cheesy sex terms aplenty. But I forgive some of it with Kitt's writing because I like the overall result. 

And for the glaring lack of plot, the mythology was surprisingly well-done. Each character's position and how they related to the Underworld was tied back to the actual mythology. The names weren't just thrown out there; each character was a fleshed-out representation of the god or being they were named after (well except for Athena and Artemis because they were just the barely-legal candy to get the party started). 

And I LOVED that Hephastus was put to good use making epic sex toys. This was never covered during my read of Percy Jackson (it was a joke, people - don't freak out). 

Do I have any Complaints? It's probably the usual one for books like these. I prefer my PwP to be shorter in length, if I'm going to read simply for titillation's (I can't even write this word without laughing) sake. It's always sort of strange to start a steamy read before bed, then find that you need to break and pick up the second half the next night. It's much more enjoyable if you can tackle the entire thing in one shot before drifting off to sleep and possibly some interesting dreams.

Carry on Without Me.

The 100 - Kass Morgan

The top of the review space (on Goodreads for your BL peeps) says : What did you think?


What did I think? I think I'm out. That's what I think. DNF @ 40%.

 

(show thoughts included below)


There were too many PoV's. As well, there were too many flashbacks for too many PoV's. And let's not forget that I get iffy when there's too much flirting/pining/romance when it starts to choke out a great sci-fi concept. 

Sadly, I'm not even sure if the show is going to work for me. When all the kids ran off the ship in a very non-cautious and jubilant way, I think my mouth dropped open. My husband casually remarked, "they're teenagers. What did you expect?"

I think I'm gonna have to give teens way more credit than that. Engaging in drunken antics which you end up regretting the next morning is not equal to disembarking a spaceship without concern on a possibly dangerous, contaminated, and uninhabited planet.

One thing I have learned about all post-apocalyptic and/or dystopia shows : everyone owns leather jackets, cargo pants, and combat boots. IN THE FUTURE, JEANS, T-SHIRTS, and RUNNING SHOES DON'T EXIST! Also, hair dye and makeup are always plentiful, even when you're nowhere near civilization

For those who've watched the show...is Glass from the book even on the show, or did I miss something here? 

Get Thee Behind me, Roy Orbison

Unsticky - Sarra Manning
"Time's up, Grace. Are you in or out?"

 

(here's the place where the review gets bumped down because I have an image and even when I resize it on BL, it still doesn't fit, no matter how tiny I make it)




Doesn't quite have the same ring as "Pretty Woman," does it?

2.75 stars. Consider Unsticky to be 1 part Chick Lit and 2 parts dramatic Contemporary Romance. Confused yet? I would have sworn this was straight chick lit...up until it wasn't. And I wasn't a fan of that weird transition. Right down to the last 100 pages, I was sure I would end up going with a 2 star rating, but I truly loved some of the character interactions/conversations which took place near the end, even though I hated how I never attached to the characters before they got to the "growth" point. 

Grace is no Julia Roberts, that's for sure. Even though Ms. Roberts has never been my personal standard for beauty, I will hand it to her that her performance of that infamous hooker is a role which has stayed with me. 

You see, this book...it could have been a fun take on the Pretty Woman theme. At first, I sort of had a Don and Megan mental picture for Grace and Vaughn...she's younger and still learning who she is. He's older and little bit cranky-slash-mysterious-slash-amusing. Their first couple of times spent together were super awkward. 

I saw it starting like this...


And ending up like this...



And it kind of did. But not really. Vaughn wants to buy Grace to be his mistress/companion, JUST LIKE IN PRETTY WOMAN. EPIC, right?

Not so much. 

Instead, it was fashion, flubs, and the manifestation of inner demons.

Grace wasn't a quirky hooker who talked like a guy and knew how to work on cars.

Nope. She worked in the fashion industry and obsessed over clothes.

Grace didn't want to know how much she'd spent and actually she didn't really care. She just wanted to fill up the gaping chasm inside her with pretty things.

Buy a pretty vibrator for your gaping chasm. It's cheaper.

I like to put on cute clothes as much as the next girl, but I don't want to actually READ about name brands and fashion as the base of a story unless we're getting some down and dirty info about the fashion industry or something. 

Vaughn is too obsessed with sweets.

She could taste vanilla ice cream and expectation.

Vaughn was already pulling the bowl closer. "Are you sure?" he asked. Grace didn't even have time to nod before he brought the spoon to his mouth. Every time he swallowed, Vaughn would close his eyes and purse his lips, like he was having these tiny moments of rapture.


Can I erase that image from my brain, the thought of a man having a mini-orgasm over ice cream? What's next, does he put on sweats and cry over chick flicks? 

IT'S JUST NOT AS GOOD LIKE THIS. Office talk and fashion rambling? No. No. No. I ran into exact the same problem again that I usually do with chick lit. Instead of it being funny or kitschy to me, the vibe generally comes across as shallow and whiny. 

OH, but wait...both of Grace and Vaughn's mentioned hang-ups tied back to the revelation of their inner demons later in the story. Wanna know something I absolutely hate to read in books? Hint : it has to do with people self-diagnosing themselves. Watching Grace wax poetic about why her compulsive shopping was a problem was painful. I'd rather stick to Vaughn being the jackass Captain Obvious and have him point out Grace's issues instead, like he was doing anyway.

Speaking of Vaughn's jackassery - by the time we get to the whole "I own you because I paid for you" part of the story, Vaughn quit being mysterious in a good way and started being creepy, secretive, deceptive, insulting and controlling instead. 

HIGH FIVE, VAUGHN. You're sure to win that douche of the year award after that adrenaline shot scene. 

But the point is that screwed-up characters generally change into better people, right? Isn't that the buildup of the story, to show character growth? 

...yes? But I don't like when I don't care if the characters even change or not, which is where I was at before any changing happened. 

However, even though I had complaints, I mostly blame the problem on me, again. I should have known better, no matter how much the Pretty Woman theme was calling out. Most romance bordering on chick lit is usually more of a miss than a hit with me, so I might be the random dissenter in a crowd of people who would genuinely like the book.

So if you like dramatic contemporary romance or chick lit (or a combo of both, which this seems to be), you will probably enjoy Unsticky much more than I did.

It's Wordy Wednesday (my non-book question time)

Are you a cuddler, or more of a hands off person? 

 

and

 

What was your favorite subject in school? 

Reading progress update: I've read 30%.

Unsticky - Sarra Manning

It's hard to tell if this book is working for me or not. I find some of the scenes to be alright (Vaughn is super-seekrit and mysterious, so I'm curious about all that), but the amount of fashion stuff and name-brand dropping...uh...I simply cannot find any cares to give. 

 

Already a Big Improvement Over Caster Chronicles

Dangerous Dream (Dangerous Creatures, #0.5) - Kami Garcia, Margaret Stohl

I know. I'm surprised too. My feelings about the Caster Chronicles series that spawned this new Dangerous Creatures series were mixed, and I never got around to finishing the previous series after seeing some spoilers for the end of book 4. I was unsure whether or not to try the spin-off books, until I saw that there was a prequel short story offering, and figured that I could spare a few minutes of my time. 

This prequel was pretty much all Ridley and Link, which hooked me instantly. I never fully got on the Ethan and Lena bandwagon with the last series, but was always a big R&L fan. 

Link is the offbeat stoner-type kid who makes fun of his best friend for being "whipped."

Ridley is the siren who uses her sexuality to bring all the men to their knees, including Link.

What trouble are these two going to get in to next? My guess is that it's going to be trouble of epic proportions.

So the big question is this : Can you read Dangerous Dream if you haven't read Caster Chronicles? I would hesitantly say yes, you can. It might take you until about 50% in to start to get a handle on what's going on (but it's a short story, so 50% is really only a few minutes). I don't know if you'll completely understand just how awesome Link and Ridley are if you haven't gotten to know them before now, but by the time you get to the club scene and find yourself immersed in Ridley's predicament, you will probably get a feel for whether or not you'll like where this story is going. If you'd really like to know more about the world background and difference between light and dark casters, but don't want to have to read through 4 books of Caster Chronicles, you could always rent the movie Beautiful Creatures for a quick crash course and introduction of the characters, even though R&L are side characters in that movie.

If things keep going as they are, I have the feeling that this series is going to be a big hit with me, and I'll end up liking it more than I did Caster Chronicles.

Troublemakers always make for more interesting stories. Link and Ridley have never marched to the beat of the traditional drum, so I look forward to what's up next. 

A free copy of this story was provided from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

It's What Floats Her Boat

Hammered by the Hydra - Persephone Parsons

Adult review for erotic and/or questionable content. I apologize for the day-o-weird-erotica. I'll be back on the normal books tomorrow.

She was transformed by the love of one perfect monster, with three sexy heads and one fantastic heart...


...and the crowd goes aww...

Right? Uh...right?

No matter. I don't think this is meant to be an aww moment. Or maybe it is and I can't tell. Maybe EVERY little girl dreams of that moment when her very own monster will come and sweep her off her feet - scales and multiple heads and all. It's just like a Disney movie where the princess waits for her handsome prince.

WHAT IS DISNEY TEACHING US?!? LOOK at these monsters. Mike's giving the thumbs up...Sully's got that "you know you want me" look. 

Am I the only one seeing it?

I'm sorry, was that off topic? Just a little?

Back to the hydras. This chick named Dixie (yes, I did go there) went looking for her sister in this mythical place where hydras and other creatures exist. I think it's a park, or a zoo, or some other such nonsense. Supposedly, after dark, the creatures go on the hunt. 

Brave Dixie battles the dark in search of her sister. No, she's not stupid. Not at all. This is monster porn. There's no such thing as stupid in monster porn. 

She walks in on her sister getting pleasured by multiple hydra heads. What does she do? She WATCHES. DUH. Doesn't EVERYONE want to get aroused by watching their sibling get off?

You didn't know this was 2-for-1 slightly incestuous porn, didya? Score?

Never fear, the sisters do not actually want each other. They each get their very own hydra-prince-charming to pleasure them sexually. 

And it was kind of entertaining...in a disturbingly funny way. 

Hey, if these women want to be consenting adults with mythical consenting adult monsters, then who am I to judge? Apparently, these monsters have hearts, and brains...and multiple mouths. And are hung like monsters. If you can get past the weird monster-look thing, it's probably a good deal. Did I buy that one of the three hydra heads was a passionate kisser? Probably not. Yes, there was a point where it became too far-fetched. *snort*

So what if you don't speak the same language? The hydra can put images into your brain and show you what they want you to know. Same thing.

I would say don't knock it until you've tried it, but I can't say that I would know how to find a hydra to try out. I guess I'll have to stick to humans.

One of These Things is Not Like the Other...

Impatient - Viola Grace

Bring on the retro sci-fi erotica vibe, and I'll just pretend to ignore the fact that nothing is explained other than the lead character telling us why (instead of how) everything just happens to be.

It's another planet, man. I guess I'm not smart enough to be told how the nanites work. They just rearrange stuffz. Golaz people are brilliant. So advanced, in fact, that they honor ancient lion-ish mating rituals and public sex marking instead of pesky unions requiring signatures and all of that nonsense. 

I'm Joffrey Baratheon Storoth, and this is how it's always been done.



Think I'm kidding? I'm really not.

"The Golaz mature slowly."


Eva was put into statis (a sleeping state) for years because she had to wait for a kid to grow into a man. Well, technically, he was a man trapped in a kid's body, but yeah...she didn't want to be hooking up with a Joffrey impersonator. 

OH, AND HE'S A LION SHIFTER. What this has to do with ANYTHING, I have no clue. 

I honestly figured this short story had been written back in the glory days of erotic cheese. Ya'know...like a decade or two or maybe even three ago. Publish date 2010? Whoa there. Wet heat seeping and channels clenching? 

Eh, the story was still kind of amusing, even with the chuckles and complete lack of explanation for the science-y stuff. I'd put this on par with a monster porn because it wasn't all that bad for a sci-fi/paranormal/wtf-ever Sleeping Beauty in Space retelling. With sex. And toe stroking. 

And this : "And now you know why I called you squirt."

Why yes, that was an awkward sexual reference. You're welcome.

If I were Eva, I still would have cut a bitch over 

my "future" man learning how to have sex with the woman who tried to kill me when I was sleeping.

(show spoiler)

 But maybe I'm just a zero tolerance kind of gal like that. 

O.o

Lone Reader Standing

Bone Crossed  - Patricia Briggs

I feel like if I tried to explain what I do and don't like about these books, it's not going to make any sense. 

My mind wanders. Even during the "exciting" parts. 

I don't know. I wish I did. It must be a personal style thing because I do read "non-fluffy" books and "not the usual genre standard" books. 

My mind wanders. Even right after I finish a chapter which held my interest, my mind wanders when things lull out for a minute. 

The series is good enough, but not grabbing me. I'll possibly try book 5 after a break (how many months did I put between 3 and 4? I don't even know, but it was a lot).